To: Paul (Son)
From: Fiona (Mom)
Subject: RE: Troy Terrace, Daglish
Monday 16th March

PS your rubbish will be collected on a Thursday - I have been looking at the City of Subiaco website.

mum

To: Art (Son)
From: Kobbie (Mom)
Subject: Thanks
Thursday 23rd April

****Oliver is the dog****

Hey buds!

How are you doing??

Weird to think your brother is 23… God, where does time go when it passes? I think it deserves a coffin and memorial service ‘cause I’m starting to mourn its passing more and more every day.

Want a fun visual? I had to break into the house and climb through a window this morning. But wait, it gets better. Dad dropped Oliver and I off about 3-miles from the house so early this morning it was still dark when we left (though not when we got home). We ran on the road, but then I decided that today we’d be adventurous and we branched off and went through the Cougar Mountain Reserve. Cool, right? Except it rained last night and there was mud and muck everywhere. We were both covered – I just laughed and said what the hell.

Until I got home and had to climb in a window.

Not wanting to ruin our very expensive paint job on the dining room walls – you guessed it, I had to strip down to my skivvies. Not fun. You see, normally, we remember to leave the garage door open when Dad drops us off on his way to work. This morning we forgot. And Dad was at the airport to catch an early morning flight, so it’s not like he could come back home to let us in.

Oh, well. Now I have a story to tell. Hope you enjoyed it. I’m not quite laughing, yet. I’ll give it a day; I’m sure I’ll come around.

Okay, I’m off.

LOVE YOU!

Mom.

To: Sarah (Daughter)
From: Elaine (Mom)
Subject: Your Dog Thingy
Date: Wednesday 15th April

At the moment I have one of those little battery operated fans going (hand bag size) cos it's so bloody HOT in here. I don't understand why, in a brand new building, they can't make the cool air flow onto me in my office and not just onto the books. Is it too much to ask that I can be COOL???? Sorry, but I am HOT, and not in a good way (although that's true too).

To: Lauren (Granddaughter)
From: Irene (Grandmother)
Subject: re:hi
Sunday 5th April 2009

yes, i understoood that yoiu were very busy. i was talking to 3 friends one at a time, your mother and your father. i don't usually hang on the phone very long except with bobby. we sometimes talk for two hours. i shall call you as soon as i've walked teddy. he had a bath yesterday with conditioner afterwards and he smells delicious. much love - grandma

SPECIAL FRIDAY ALLOWANCE! EMAILS FROM YOUR DAD!

To: Allison (Daughter), Ruth (Wife)

From: Edward (Dad)

Re: "GO RED FOR WOMEN"

Friday 6 February

I was just extorted for $5.00 for a little round pin and a stale piece of Danish. Is your heart so different from mine that your heart needs a special day and mine doesn't.



Allison emailed her dad back a response to this, and then he replied with:

I am wearing the button for fear of ostracism. The danish I gave away. Interestingly enough, a stale danish is one of the unhealthiest creatures on earth.

To: Howie (Son)
From: Shelley (Mom)
Re: tony stewart
Wednesday 22nd October

Howie,

Who is Tony Stewart?

To: Art (Son)
From: Kobbie (Mom)
Subject: re: Abuela
January 26th 2009

Hey buds –

We spent this past weekend up in Bellingham, Washington on a dog training clinic. It was intense. And, we discovered, Oliver is a very bad dog, indeed. Oh, a lovable little guy – LOVES everyone and everything – but he thinks every molecule of the universe is his. He's willing to share, but it's his. He rules. This is going to be a very hard concept to drill out of him, though he came close to learning it. Every time he got near a male dog, they'd growl, grumble and one went so far to bite him. I, of course, freaked out – but we were to blame. We had to take a doggy time-out. And, they're right, Oliver did go up to him and try to sniff/play – encroached on "his" space. But, jeez. Needless to say, was not the weekend I was expecting.

Miss you, buds – hope you're feeling grand!

Love you,

Mom.